高中英语作文20分评分标准【通用20篇】

Everyone has their own dreams， I am the same. But my dream is not a lawyer， not a doctor， not actors， not even an industry.

Perhaps my dream big people will find it ridiculous， but this has been my pursuit! My dream is to want to have a folk life! I want it to become a beautiful painting， it is not only sharp colors， but also the colors are bleak， I do not rule out the painting is part of the black， but I will treasure these bleak colors! Not yet， how about， a colorful painting， if not bleak， add color， how can it more prominent American? Life is like painting， painting the bright red color represents life beautiful happy moments. Painting a bleak color represents life difficult， unpleasant time. You may find a flat with a beautiful road is not very good yet， but I do not think it will. If a person lives flat then what is the point?

Life is only a short few decades， I want it to go Finally， Each memory is a solid.

When holiday comes, thousands of people pour into the tourist sites, they want to relax themselves and enjoy the beautiful scenery. But Chinese people have a bad habit, they like to leave some notes on the site, proving them have been here before.

Such a behavior has been criticized by the public, because the leaving note will damage the preservation of the tourist site.

Most of the tourist sites are part of our country’s historical relics, these sites are priceless, it is everyone’s duty to protect the sites.

When we go to travel, we should behave ourselves. First, we need to have the idea that no rubbish being leaved behind when we leave the site. We should take away what we bring, keep the environment clean. Second, no any notes being written in the sites. Though in the old days, Chinese workers like to leave their names on the sites, but now it is a new world, we need to behave ourselves.

当节假日到来的时候，成千上百的人聚集在旅游景点，他们想要放松，享受美丽的风景。但是中国人有一个坏习惯，他们喜欢在景点留下一些记号，证明曾经在此旅游。这样的行为遭到了大众的批评，因为留下的记号会破坏景点的保存。

大部分景点是国内的历史文物，是无价的，保护文物是每一个人的责任。

当文明旅游时候，应该要规范自己的行为。第一，文明需要有这样的观念，当我们离开景点时，不能留下垃圾，拿走带来的一切。第二，不在景点留下记号。虽然在古代，中国的文人喜欢留下他们的名字，但是现在是新时代，我们要规范自己的行为。

[高中英语作文：文明旅游

高中生活的第一天

The First Day in High School

Today was the first day of my new life. I looked at my new books and checked everything for the new school year. I was excited as well as worried.

今天是我新生活的第一天，我翻看我的新课本，检查了新学年的一切。我既激动又担心。

Entering new school, I was curious about everything, new classrooms, new teachers, new classmates etc. It would be a new start for each student. And what I was worried about is that I had no friends here. I wondered if no liked to play with me. Were the teachers strict with students?

进入新的学校，我对所有事情都很好奇，新的教室，新的老师，新的同学等等。这对每个学生来说都是一个新的开始。我所担心的是在这没有朋友。我想知道是不是没有人喜欢和我玩。老师对学生是不是很严厉？

I fell relaxed when the teacher asked me, What else could I help you, freshman?". I found that the teachers were kind and polite, and the classmates around me were friendly. While I was thinking about how to get on well with my classmates, my desk mate showed me his favorite Ipad4s. He wanted to play with me, but I didnt know how to play, so he taught me patiently, and we played happily.

当老师问我：“我能够帮你什么吗，新同学？”的时候，我一下子觉得放松了。我发现老师很善良很有礼貌，周围的同学也很友善。正当我想着怎样和同学相处的时候，我的同桌给我看他最爱的Ipad4s。他想和我一起玩，但是我不知道怎么玩，于是他就耐心的教我，然后我们就开心的玩起来。

Worries have gone, and happiness is coming.

忧虑已经消失了，幸福即将来临。

There has been a long time for my family not to go out for the activity, because my father is busy all the time. But last week, my father finally finished his project, so that he could take a rest for some time.

My father advised us to go to the zoo, I was so excited, because I hadn’t seen many animals in my life.

In the zoo, there were so many people, it was so lively.

I saw the monkey, the giraffe and so on.

I saw these animals in the TV usually, but I saw them in front of me that day. The peacock impressed me so much, it looked homely when it laid down the ground, but when it stood up and opened the wings, it was so gorgeous. People said peacock was proud, indeed, it would not please people. I had a good time in the zoo.

对于我的家人来说，我们已经有很长一段时间没有外出活动了，因为爸爸总是很忙。

但是上周，我的爸爸终于完成了他的项目，所以他能休息一段时间。爸爸建议我们去动物园，我很兴奋，因为我目前还没有看到过很多动物。在动物园里，有很多人，非常热闹。我看到了猴子，长颈鹿等等。我平常在电视上看到这些动物，但是那天我亲眼看到了。

孔雀给我的印象很深刻，在它躺在地上的时候，看起来很普通，但是当它站起来，打开翅膀，是那么的美丽。人们说孔雀是傲慢的，确实，它不会取悦人们。在动物园里我度过了一段美好的时光。

[高中英语作文：动物园一日游

Every child is surrounded by the deep mother love. However, we often turn a

blind eye to the love. One day I deeply felt the love.

One day I hurried home for lunch after school, because there would be an exam

in the afternoon and I had expected to go back to school early to prepare for

the exam. But when I got home, the lunch was not ready yet. I felt unhappy. When

the dishes were served, I forund none I like. I ran out of my house angrily and

wanderde on the street for a while,hungry. Then I walked to school.

When I got into the classroom, I saw a lunch box on my desk. One classmate

told me that it was my mother ther that had brought it here.After opening the

box, I found my favorite food inside. My eyes was moist with tears.

Mother gave me her love without asking for return, How deep mother love

is!

Last night, as I felt so bored, so I started to watch movie, my friend asked me to watch Mist, she told me it was very shocking, I was so looking forward to seeing it.

Mist is a horror movie, it told about a great mist covered the country, people struggled to live in the world with big monster, at the end, as there was no way to survive, so the protagonist killed his son to make him relieve, just after a few second, the rescue came.

The ending is so hopeless for the protagonist, if he holds on for a few second, everything will be changed. The story tells people never to give up hope, who knows what will happen the next second. If we give up hope, we can’t see the good things that will come around. Keeping the hope is very important, it will help us to overcome the difficulty.

昨晚，我感到很无聊，所以我开始看电影，我的朋友叫我去看《迷雾》，她说那部电影很震惊，我很期待看。《迷雾》是一部恐怖片，讲述了一场大雾笼罩国家，人们挣扎着在这个世界上和怪物存活，最后，由于是在无路可退，男主人公杀死了他的儿子，为了让他解脱，只是过了一会，救援队就来了。对于男主人公来说结局是多么的绝望啊，如果他坚持一会，事情就会不一样了。故事告诉人们永远都不要放弃希望，谁知道下一秒钟会发生什么事情呢。如果我们放弃希望，我们就看不到接下来的事情。怀抱希望是很重要的，它能让我们克服困难。

[高中英语作文：怀抱希望

proud of yourself; when you fail, never give up. Please smile to face your life. If you do this, you will find the sky more blue; the sea more green….. Your life will become better and better!

One day my grandmother and I went to the park, it began to rain when we got there. Some people were disappointed, but my grandmother smiled: "it is good to rain, it will water the field, and the crops will grow better. I think so. If we can change our mind to see the things, we will discover all things are beautiful. In everyones life, the mood is very important. It can encourage unsuccessful people not to lose heart, to make sad people feel better. At last I want to say, if you enjoy life, you will be happy forever.

The Ten-minute Break Between Classes Time seems to be so limited for us Senior Three students. As a result, more and more students try to study from early morning till late afternoon, even during the ten-minute breaks. In my view, taking a ten minute break between classes is equally important. Otherwise, we will feel exhausted both physically and mentally,During the ten minute break, we are supposed to do something really relaxing, we need is to have a rest, instead of getting more tired. Besides, studying during the break doesn ’ t necessarily mean that you will achieve more. So doing nothing tiring in that short period is of greater significance. As far as my ten-minute breaks are concerned, sometimes I take some simple exercise, such as having a walk with my classmates, or just a free chat to refresh myself. When the next class begins, I feel energetic again.

Thanksgiving Day

Thanksgiving is a holiday celebrated in much of North America, generally observed as an expression of gratitude, usually to God. The most common view of its origin is that it was to give thanks to God for the bounty of the autumn harvest. In the United States, the holiday is celebrated on the fourth Thursday in November. In Canada, where the harvest generally ends earlier in the year, the holiday is celebrated on the second Monday in October, which is observed as Columbus Day or protested as Indigenous Peoples Day in the United States.

Thanksgiving is traditionally celebrated with a feast shared among friends and family. In the United States, it is an important family holiday, and people often travel across the country to be with family members for the holiday. The Thanksgiving holiday is generally a "four-day" weekend in the United States, in which Americans are given the relevant Thursday and Friday off. Thanksgiving is almost entirely celebrated at home, unlike the Fourth of July or Christmas, which are associated with a variety of shared public experiences.

[高中英语作文感恩节

My hometown mulan, in towns the low-profile, flowing is the biggest tributary of heilongjiang, songhua river.

Morning breeze is blowing, microwave float. Clouds of light on the water with water. The shore, sending out the scent of the grass shore willow branches are swaying gently. Vaguely saw the outline of the mountain, river, continuous mountains were like this microwave, let a person feel is gentle and kind, like a mothers letters, also does not say to tire. The sides of the river is full of green. Grass, leaves, and the river of life is green, they are in the start of the day is full of green hope.

The sun is shining, the songhua river water. River billowing east go, is to seize the legendary treasure? Wash the sound of water, the branches swaying and laughing voices of people constitute a jolly, light travel route. Sunshine is aspersed spread evenly on the river, river sparkling, seems like a big moving mirror, reflecting the dazzling light.

Into the night, the sun sets to the west, on the river and the gold of the horizon. Deep blue sky, a bright moon hanging in the round, each star like a sparkling gem with the sky. The moon reflected on the river, also is so round, like the river on the also have a moon. In the quiet of the night, the songhua river is also gradually fell asleep, ended its journey of a day.

The beauty of a gentle, songhua river is wild, it is quiet...

Marcel Hirscher continued his dominant start to the alpine skiing World Cup season with yet more milestones on Sunday.

The Austrian, seeking an unprecedented fifth consecutive overall title, became the first man to win three successive giant slalom races at the Alta Badia venue, in Italys Dolomite mountains.

He claimed the World Cup lead from Aksel Lund Svindal, moving 20 points ahead of the Norwegian -- who was 28th, following his two speed-event wins in preceding days at nearby Val Gardena.

Hirscher claimed his fourth victory this season, and his third in giant slalom -- a technical discipline where he already leads by 134 points after only four rounds.

He was 0.19 seconds ahead of Norways Henrik Kristoffersen after the two runs, while Frances Victor Muffat-Jeandet was third.

Read More

"I skied at my 100% limit in the second run," Hirscher said after the 35th win of his career put him one behind sixth-placed compatriot Benjamin Raich in the all-time standings.

"It was difficult snow, not as icy as were used to here in Alta Badia and I think that Henrik skied a smoother run, but I gave it all my power and in the end I am really happy to come away with the win."

In Sundays womens action, Eva-Maria Brem made it a double giant slalom success for Austria by winning in Courchevel, France.

Switzerlands Lara Gut, who won twice at Val dIsere in Fridays alpine combined and Saturdays downhill, tied for second with Norways Nina Loeseth.

Gut extended her overall World Cup lead to 58 points over American star Lindsey Vonn, who was 13th following her crash on Saturday.

"I didnt really feel very balanced today," Vonn said. "I think I just rung my bell a little bit yesterday."

Brem claimed her second career World Cup victory, having been runner-up in the previous giant slalom races at Aspen and ?re.

"Every season I just need that one moment when everything gets together -- that one run, like the second one in Aspen when I felt, This is how I need to keep this working," the 27-year-old said.

"I knew what I had to do, but waiting at the start was tough. That second victory was beautiful too and that made me cry."

高中自我介绍英语作文一

My name is________ . There are ________(数字) people in my family. My father is a Chemistry teacher. He teaches chemistry in senior high school. My mother is an English teacher. She teaches English in the university. I have a younger brother, he is a junior high school student and is preparing for the entrance exam.

I like to read English story books in my free time. Sometimes I surf the Internet and download the E- books to read. Reading E- books is fun. In addition, it also enlarges my vocabulary words because of the advanced technology and the vivid animations.

I hope to study both English and computer technology because I am interested in both of the subjects. Maybe one day I could combine both of them and apply to my research in the future.

高中自我介绍英语作文二

My name is________ . I am from ________. There are________(数字)people in my family. My father works in a computer company. He is a computer engineer. My mother works in a international trade company. She is also a busy woman. I have a older sister and a younger brother. My sister is a junior in National Taiwan University. She majors in English. My brother is an elementary school student. He is 8 years old.

Because of my father, I love surfing the Internet very much. I play the on-line game for about 2 hours every day. I wish I could be a computer program designer in the future. And that is why I am applying for the electronics program in your school.

高中自我介绍英语作文三

My name is Li Hua. I was born in the city of Dalian, Liaoning Province. I studied in Guangming Primary School from 1984 to 1990. Then I entered

NO. 6 Middle School where I mainly learned the subjects like Chinese, mathematics, English, physics, chemistry and computer. I have been very fond of and good at English and computer ever since. Therefore I placed first in the school computer competition last year. My hobbies include swimming in summer, skating in winter as well as collecting stamps and listening to popular music in my spare time.

高中自我介绍英语作文四

I am linjiang. I was born in jilin changchun. I graduate from Henan University of Urban Construction. I started learning English since I was 15 years old.My father is a farmer . And my mother is a housewife. I am the youngest one in my family. My brother have a lot of American friends. That’s why I have no problem communicating with Americans or others by speaking English.

In my spare time, I like to do anything relating to English such as listening to English songs, watching English movies or TV programs, or even attending the activities held by some English clubs or institutes. I used to go University for a short- term English study. During that time, I learned a lot of daily life English and saw a lot of different things.

I think language is very interesting. I could express one substanceby using different sounds. So I wish I could study and read more English enlarge my knowledge.

高中自我介绍英语作文五

My name is ________. I am graduatefrom ________ seniorhigh school and major in ________. There are ________ people in my family. My father works in a computer company. And my mother is a housewife. I am the youngest one in my family.

In my spare time, I like to read novels. I think reading could enlargemy knowledge. As for novels, I could imagine whatever I like such as a well-known scientist or a kung-fu master. In addition to reading, I also like to play PC games. A lot of grownups think playing PC games hinders the students from learning. But I think PC games could motivate me to learn something such as English or Japanese.My favorite course is English because I think it is interesting to say one thing via different sounds. I wish my English could be improved in the next four years and be able to speak fluent English in the future

The after-class activities in my school are colorful. Every day we play basketball, football, do rope skipping and so on. But I like the Month of Science and Technology and the Cultural Festival most. In those days, we have a chance: to show ourselves to all the students. We can invent something with some classmates. And we can act in a play or make a speech or take part in the competition of singing. I enjoy myseff in those activities.

我们学校的课外活动丰富多彩。每天我们打篮球、踢足球、跳绳等等。但是我最喜欢科技月和文化节。那时我们有机会向所有学生展示我们自己。我们可以和其他同学一起做小发明。我们还可以表演、演讲或参加唱歌比赛。我非常喜欢这些活动。

As the saying goes, "A friend in need is a friend indeed". Friends play a very essential role in our daily life. However, how to make goods friends is a problem for most of us. As for me, I have three principles to choose friends.

正如谚语所说的那样，患难见真情。朋友在我们日常生活中扮演着非常重要的角色。然而，如何交到一个好朋友是我们大多数人都遇到过的问题。

In the first place, good friends should have their own principles. We should take into account the fact that people who insist on their principles have high quality. Therefore, it is worth making friends with them.

首先，好朋友应该是有他们自己的处事原则。我们应该认识到这样一个事实，坚持自己原则的人一般都是具有高尚的品格。因此，这样的人值得我们去交朋友。

Then, I want to point out that good friends should be full of trust. This kind of person has a pure heart, so we can communicate with each other by heart.

然后，我想说的是，好的朋友应该是充满真诚的。这样的朋友有一颗赤子之心，我们能用心来彼此交流。

Finally, active friends are just like beautiful sunshine. They can light up our blue mood, drive away the dark clouds and give us courage.

最后，拥有积极心态的朋友就像美丽的阳光。他们能够照亮我们忧郁的心情，驱走乌云，给我们鼓励。

Friends who have above three characteristics will be great wealth for us.

能交到有以上三个特征的朋友将会是我们巨大的财富。

导语：运用一些谚语可以给我们的英语作文加分哦，下面是yuwenmi小编为大家整理的优秀英语作文素材，欢迎阅读与借鉴，谢谢!

A fall into the pit, a gain in your wit.

吃一堑，长一智。

Like tree, like fruit.

有其因必有其果。

Manners make the man.

礼貌造就人。

Never neglect an opportunity for improvement.

抓住大好时机，切莫等闲错过。

Never too old (or late) to learn.

学到老，学不了。

No great loss without some small gain.

塞翁失马，安知非福。

No one can call back yesterday.

往日不复返。

No sooner said than done.

言而必行。

No sweet without some sweat.

不劳则无获。

Nothing is difficult to a man who wills.

世上无难事，只怕有心人。

Nothing is impossible to willing mind (or heart).

有志者事竟成。

Nothing is impossible (or difficult) to the man who will try.

天下无难事，只怕不努力。

A friend in need is a friend indeed.

患难朋友才是真朋友。

A friend is a second self.

朋友是另一个我。

A friend is best found in adversity.

患难见真友。

All time is no time when it is past.

光阴一去不复返。

Education has for its object the formation of character.

教育的目的在於培养品德。

An idle youth, a needy age.

少壮不努力，老大徒伤悲。

Business before pleasure.

事业在先，享乐在後。

Diligence is near success.

勤奋近乎成功。

Diligence is the mother of good luck.

刻苦是成功之母。

Diligence is the mother of success.

勤奋是成功之母。

Actions speak louder than words.

事实胜於雄辩。

Adversity leads to prosperity.

逆境迎向昌盛。

Every brave man is a man of his word.

勇敢的人都是信守诺言的人。

Every man is the architect of his own fortune.

每个人都是他自己命运的建诛师。

Every man is the master of his own fortune.

每个人都是他自己的命运的主宰。

Failure is the mother of success.

失败是成功之母。

Faith will move mountains.

精诚所至，金石为开。

Friendship ---- one soul in two bodies.

友谊是两人一条心。

Grasp all, lose all.

贪多必失。

He alone is poor who does not possess knowledge.

没有知识，才是贫穷。

Health is above wealth.

健康胜於财富。

Health is better than wealth.

健康胜於财富。

He who does not advance falls backward.

不进则退。

Honesty is the best policy.

诚实是上策。

Hope is life and life is hope.

希望才有人生，人生要有希望。

Idle young, needy old.

少壮不努力，老大徒伤悲。

If you dont aim high you will never hit high.

不立大志，难攀高峰。

I might say that success is won by three things: first, effort; second, more effort; third, still more effort.

成功之道唯三点∶努力、努力、再努力。

All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy; all play and no work makes Jack a mere boy. www.yyzw.com

只工作，不玩耍，聪明孩子要变傻;尽玩耍，不学习，聪明孩子没出息。

A near friend is better than a far-dwelling kinsman.

远亲不如近邻。

Improve your time and your time will improve you.

珍惜时间，时间才会珍惜你。

In doing we learn.

行而知。

Industrry if fortunes right hand, and frugality her left.

勤勉是幸福的右手，节俭是幸福的左手。

In lifes earnest battle they only prevail, who daily march onward and never say fail.

在人生的搏斗中，只有日日前进不甘失败的人，才能获胜。

It is dogged (that) does it.

天下无难事，只怕有心人。

Judge not according to the appearance.

不要以貌取人。

Labour is often the father of pleasure.

勤劳常为快乐之源。

Learning without thought is labour lost; thought without learning is perilous.

学而不思则罔，思而不学则殆。

示例：

Dear ____,

I am truly sorry that_______(道歉的原因).

The reason is that ______(介绍原因) Once again, I am sorry for any inconvenience caused. Hope you can accept my apologies and understand my situation.

Yours sincerely

Li Ming

Today, when I awaked up, I found the air-conditioner didn’t work. I used the control, but it still didn’t work. I knew the air-conditioner was in trouble. I went downstairs. My father told me two air-conditioner and two netputer had been broken. Because my father used electric making machine to make electric, so the voltage was not stable. It led to the trouble. Oh! Whenever the government will let the factory use electric? If it lasts longer, I will be crazy!!

安徽省合肥市包河区教育局教研室 王一枝

根据初中阶段的写作具体目标：写作时考虑不同的目的和对象，写作要感情真挚，力求表达自己对自然、社会、人生的独特感受和真切体验;多角度地观察生活，发现生活的丰富多彩，捕捉事物的特征，力求有创意地表达;根据表达的中心，选择恰当的表达方式。合理安排内容的先后和详略。条理清楚地表达自己的意思。运用联想和想像，丰富表达的内容;写记叙文，做到内容具体：写简单的说明文，做到明白清楚;写简单的议论文，做到有理有据;根据生活需要，写日常应用文……简单地说，就是会写记叙文、简单的说明文、简单的议论文和一般的应用文;内容具体明确，语言文从字顺;感情真实健康，力求有创意。安徽省中考作文评分基本上涵盖了上述精神。

一、作文评分总体要求

以安徽省2009年中考题“师生之间”为例，对中考作文评分标准具体分析，具有可解读性和可操作性。这个命题作文，它的内容很宽泛，可写的东西很多，有关师生之间的事、物、情，皆可入文。具体评分要求如下：

1、要审清题目。文章要切题，不能写成“我的老师”， 要扣住“之间”来写，是老师和学生之间的双向活动。

2、体裁要分辨清。叙事有起伏，阐述有哲理，写人须有触动人物内心深处，抒情、议论兼而有之。

3、立意要有创新。文题看似平平淡淡，没有精心雕琢，但要写出独特的、与众不同之处。师生老师与学生的界定可以引申、拓展，也可以是广义的。

4、文章有真情实感。写事要具体可感，语言要流畅，有文采，有点睛之笔，行文思路清晰，感情充沛。

二、作文分等分类简述

就阅卷评分标准结合学生实际作文情况，作文大致分为以下几类：

(一)力求创新。力避旧瓶装新酒，有的同学在考场中将师与生进行引申、比喻，文章开头引用《三字经》中的“生不学，师之惰”，接着亮出自己的观点，“生不学”未必是“师之惰”，用“诸葛亮与刘禅”这对师生来佐证。以思辩的眼光去看待师生之间的关系，提倡一种平等、和谐的新型师生关系，这篇文章结构完整、首尾照应、层次清楚、语言流畅，应属一类文(得54分)。

(二)形式新颖。

形式新颖，内容详实、描写具体。比如一位考生列了四个小标题：“酸”、“甜”、“苦”、“辣”，分别写了与老师之间的四件事，也都有师生之间的活动，有师生间真挚的情感，内容具体真实，可成为一篇佳作，属一类中等(得50分)。

(三)误读题意。一位考生将师生之间写成了“教与学”的关系，整篇文章围绕着“师傅领进门，修行在个人”来写。在立意、内容上只能归属为三类下、四类上。(得30分左右)

(四)选材陈旧。在选材方面流于俗套而缺乏真挚的情感。比如很多考生写在我生病时老师不顾羸弱的身体背着我去医院，老师在下雨天送我回家，把伞让给学生，自己却淋透了，生病了等。没有从生活实际中选取典型的、新颖的、感人的事例来表现主题。这样的事例不够典型，情感也抒发的不到位就难以达到感动人的目的。属三类下。(得32分)

(五)切题不紧。中等成绩的考生的作文都更倾向于写老师是如何对待自己的，主要写老师是如何关心我，如何辅导我的学习，这样的文章中老师的行动是主体，其中穿插了学生的感悟与体会，但占的笔墨不多，因为写老师的文字中必然有学生的活动。这样的文章不能说完全切题，也不能说离题，因为它写到了老师对学生的关爱与呵护。属于二类下、三类上。(得38分)

(六)文体单一。绝大多数写成记叙文，显得平铺直叙，没有生动、细致的描写，选择写议论文的很少，即使有所议论，也是空发感慨。基本上分数不会太高。(得25分上下)

三、中考作文评分细则解读

我们通常用语言优美、立意新颖、结构独特、构思精巧、内容充实、感情真实、表达恰当等方面去评判优秀学生的作文。其实，对于绝大多数学生来说，评分标准的制定有所局限性，就安徽省而言，主要从内容和表达两个方面对作文的评分细则简要解析。

(一)内容方面：

新课标所提倡的作文理念，在安徽省的作文命题及评分标准的制定中已得到很好的体现。内容具体、充实的作文也不在少数，考生视野开阔，体现了他们对生活的感悟，做到了我手写我心，出现了一大批关注亲情友情、关注社会自然、关注艺术历史的佳作。如2007年安徽省的“我们的心近了”，有考生写通过感悟李白、李煜和岳飞的诗词与他们的爱国之心;有写通过印度洋海啸与世界人民的心近了，通过中国免除非洲债务，中国人民与非洲人民的心近了……这些选材与立意都是很高的，有部分考生写社会生活的一些小小的细节反映人与人之间的心近了，如写为瓜农提供方便，与辛苦劳作的人心近了;到山区体验生活与农村孩子的心近了，选材立意温暖人心……我感到：出题人与考生的心近了，考生与家庭、学校、社会、自然、历史的心近了。具体得分点有以下几点：

(1)中心明确。有些考生选材虽好，但中心不够明确，如有考生写了三个片断：与同学的心近了，与老师的心近了，与父母的心近了，但各有自己的中心，没有将三个片断统一到一个主题上。还有将“心近了”误当成团结、友爱的同义词，写成了“团结就是力量”、“友爱使人快乐”等主题。

(2)文章切题 。未抓住题眼“近了”，“近了”是一个过程，而这个过程有些考生未作为重点。如有一个考生重点描写了父母与自己的矛盾，而对矛盾解决的过程即“近了”只是一笔带过就总结说“我们的心近了”，作文主次不分明。个别考生干脆将“心近了”写成“心静了”，严重偏题。有的同学字顺文美，读之感人，但读后和材料要求对照，跑题了。

(3)内容充实。少数学生为了出新出奇，另辟蹊径，对“老师”和“学生“的内涵和外延进行了拓展。如有学生把“书本”、“大自然”等比作“老师”，写出自己徜徉其中的经历和感受。有些考生将作文写成议论文或者散文，虽反复点题，但内容不够具体，缺少有力的论据或感人的细节，只是空洞的议论或抒情。如：无视“我们的心”，写成“他们的心近了”。如一个考生创作了一篇小说，笔触细腻地写了两个小女孩由竞争到互相帮助的过程，但用的是第三人称的叙述视角，没有“我们的心近了”之意，很遗憾地与一类作文失之交臂。其实只要将小说中的一个角色换成“我”即可。大部分考生都能围绕中心有话可写，内容也较充实。写作水平较高的学生所写内容都能较好地兼顾“老师”和“学生”两个方面，紧扣中心，表达有技巧，具有一的表现力，演绎出师生之间的情感变化，常令人耳目一新。

(4)感情真实。出现了许多题材雷同的套作。可能是时代变了，考生的作文中有不少写对后妈由排斥到心近的过程。有许多夫妻离婚可以理解，怎么父母离婚了，孩子都是跟着爸爸?后妈个个都那么宽容、忍让?这类作品有些感情不够真实，很难得高分。

(5)立意新颖。作文关键抓住“心近了”来立意，选材涉及到对题目中的 “我们”的具体所指，大多数学生理解为“我与父亲”、“我与母亲”、“我与老师”、“我与同学”、“我与朋友”、“我与后爸”、“我与后妈”等，具体所指的身边人物，当属切题作文;还有把“我们”理解为台湾与祖国大陆，香港、澳门与祖国，时值香港回归祖国十周年之际，属立意有一定的高度;还有理解为中国与世界、中国加入WTO，世界经济一体化;中国与日本、涉及到中日两国由来已久的渊源关系，到当下的中日关系;中国与印度，涉及海啸中中国人民的友好援助。这些都充分体现了学生对时事的关注，对焦点问题的思考，眼界相当开阔，立意也很深刻。

除以上几方面以外，还有就是我与书，我与语文，我与古代名家，像李白、杜甫、陶渊明、李煜等等，写得是大气磅礴，文采飞扬，充分显示了学生深厚的文学底蕴，这些当属一类作文中的上品。

(二)表达方面

(1)表达方式运用得好。多数考生表达方式运用的合理，但也有一些考生处理不好。如：出现了一些结构不够完整，表达方式单一，甚至不知所云的作品，如一些考生通篇记叙自己与父母关系“近了”的事实，没有动人的细节描写，语言平淡无味，缺少感染力，缺少个性;从表达角度来看，大多数学生还是以大量口语化的语言出现在卷面，缺乏书面语，缺少语文的文学气息。

(2)结构完整，条理清楚。如：一位考生的考场作文，全文的结构如下：师生之间是加减乘除。一：师生之间是+，老师+学生=家;二：师生之间是-，减去烦恼;三：师生之间是×，师生相乘，走向成功;四：师生之间是÷，除去陋习，让学生改邪归正。总结：加减乘除都是爱。

(3)语句流畅、通顺。语言以朴实真挚风格为主，有不少语言流畅、文采飞扬的佳作。如：有一位考生写中日关系近了，远溯到唐代用鉴真六次东渡和晁衡留居长安证明两国一衣带水的亲密，又提到近代日本对中国的侵略，日本右翼分子的猖狂，中国一部分人民身受伤害后的仇日情绪表现“远”了，然后用两国民间社团友好往来，温总理“融冰之旅”表现两国人民相互了解和对和平友好的向往以及希望世界和平的主题。行文结构严谨，通篇语言流畅，美妙的比喻和一气呵成的排比层出不穷，且恰到好处。最后以“心近了，心静了，心惊了，心敬了，心近了”结束全篇，耐人寻味。

有少数学生引用古诗文名句，巧用一些修辞造句，驾驶语言的能力相当强。 如： 开篇： 蒲公英因长风飞向远方，小树苗因甘霖获得滋长，学生因老师而成材。结尾：冰寒于水而出于水，青胜于蓝而出于蓝。纵观整体来说，基本上做到了语句通顺，表述清楚。一部分考生通篇议论抒情、空喊口号，令人乏味;还有个别考生掉书袋，几乎每一句都要引用古诗句，没有自己的语言和感悟可言。

(三)字数的要求。安徽省及芜湖市均有明确的规定：考虑到内容的充实，文章不要少于500字。字数不足500字，每少50字酌情扣一分。但是，一篇文章写的字数较少分量自然很轻。其实，400字、500字的作文扣分不过2分，可再少就不仅仅是字数的问题了。从考场作文实际看，600-700字的作文很多，分数上也偏向这些文章。

(四)、卷面书写。试卷最后一项得分栏就是卷面得分，共5分。根据是书写干净与否;有无涂抹和大面积改动;字体端正、匀称、工整与否。卷面整洁，书写、标点、格式正确等一般给4—5分，最少2—3分。从得分看，字体有形、书写清楚的文章得分较高，好作文卷面分也很高，是相辅相成的。

《语文课程标准》的总目标中，对学生写作能力有如下概括：能具体明确、文从字顺地表达自己的意思，能根据日常生活需要，运用常见的表达方式写作。其实，作文评分标准只是参考，最主要的是鼓励学生写真事、抒真情，写作的过程也是一个教育学生做人的过程。

20XX年X月X日 晴

Summer holidday is coming.I have a good plan for it.My best friend Tony who is from Britain will spend the holiday with mw.Tom is 17 years old ,he like China very much.

One week ago,I wrote him a letter,inviting him to come to Dalian for the holidays.Tony has accepted my invitation and will fly to Dalian next week.I will go to the airport to pick him up.Then well show him around the city.Well go to the beach to watch the sea first.

Then well visit some insteresing places.Tony will live in my house during the holiday.I hope well have a good time.

In high school, Chinese students study very hard to fight for the future

college, while in western countries, students are spending time in taking all

kinds of activities. Though students from different countries have different

ways to spend high school time, they make the decision and take charge of their

life. This is the best age to learn knowledge, their brain can remember words

and numbers quickly. For making friends, they will probably meet their lifetime

friends. During three years, besides gaining knowledge and making friends, they

grow so fast, not only in body, but also in mind. Being independent is the main

feature. They can make a lot of decisions without asking parents for help. When

they are equipped themselves with basic skill, then they can better get used to

the new environment, which is important for future life.

Dear Nate,

I am so excited to hear that you will come to learn Chinese in our school.

Now let me tell you something about our school. Our school is the key school of

our city with the most beautiful campus. It has many trees, flowers and a lot of

grass. We have two very nice and teaching buildings and a dormitory building. In

addition, the school is well-equipped with excellent equipment, such as a new

gym, a computer room and a large library. There are also a lot of electives to

choose from, such as painting, typing and cooking. Above all, there are many

excellent teachers in our school. Classes are interesting, the teachers are

kind, well-educated and knowledgeable and willing to help students in study as

well as in life. I like my school very much. I hope you will like it, too.

Yours sincerely

Daniel