有关愚人节的英语作文【推荐20篇】

Many people believe that human activity is causing the earth’s temperature

to rise. They say that this global warming will have dreadful consequences for

our environment, such as drought and flooding.

What should governments do to help prevent global warming? Give reasons for

your suggestions.

The earth’s temperature is rapidly changing. As a result there has been a

lot of climate change such as heat waves, droughts and floods. Scientists

believe that this is the result of human activity, which is polluting the

Earth’s atmosphere. This could become a disaster if governments do not act to

help prevent global warming. They can act in three ways; by supporting research,

by making laws and by keeping the general public informed.

Firstly, governments can support research. For example, they should

encourage companies to develop vehicles that cause less pollution. They should

also support alternative sources of electricity from wind and water rather than

from oil and coal. As well, they should sponsor conferences to discuss the

effects of greenhouse gas emissions and possible solutions to the problem.

Secondly, they should make laws that limit the amount of greenhouse gases

that companies can emit. Private companies should be rewarded for following

these laws. They should also be punished for creating pollution.

Finally, everybody is affected by global warming. Therefore, it is

important that governments involve individuals in the problem solving process.

For example they should encourage households to save as much energy as possible

by using more efficient light bulbs or less hot water. They should also

encourage the public to recycle, and this should be compulsory for everyone.

Another way of saving energy is by public transport systems. Governments should

spend money on public transport to make it as easy as possible for the public to

save energy.

In summary, it is clear that there are a lot of things that governments can

do to prevent global warming. They should involve companies, support scientists

and encourage individuals to protect the planet.

Panda is our country’s treasure, we should protect it. nowadays, we see

from the TV that panda is less than before, it is not only because of the damage

of the environment, but also the weakness of the panda. Everybody loves panda,

it is so lovely, a panda has two black eyes, it is very lazy, it likes sleeping

all the time. When we see its round body shape, we can’t help loving them. In

order to see the lovely animal, we need to protect them. We must protect the

environment, like not to throw the rubbish away, not to cut down the trees. We

condemn such behavior that killing the animals. Protecting the animals is

everybody’s job.

Nowadays university graduates have different job outlooks. For most of them, to find a job with satisfactory pay is their most important wish while majority want to be self – employed. However, a certain number of graduates are not in a hurry to hunt for jobs. They are just waiting for better chances. Toward this point of view, some experts warn that it is not wise to be just waiting. They advise that graduates should find a regular, full-time job as quickly as possible so that they can earn money to support themselves and get working experience, which will help to find a better position later. Moreover, it might be more difficult to find a satisfactory job next year.

如今大学毕业生的就业前景不同。对于大部分孩子来说，要找到一个令人满意的支付工作是他们最重要的希望，而多数是希望能够自我 - 就业。但是，一定数量的毕业生不急于寻找就业机会。他们只是在等待更好的机会。对这一观点，一些专家警告说，只是等待这是不明智的。他们提醒毕业生应该找到一个正规，全职工作，以便尽可能快的挣钱来养活自己和获得工作经验，这将有助于找到更好的更高的位置。此外，明年可能更难找到一个称心如意的工作。

As the saying goes "qiu dong smog knife to kill". We can see and catch

"smog" actually have bigger influence on the body, especially the high incidence

of respiratory and cardiovascular and cerebrovascular diseases in the elderly

group.

1. The effects on the respiratory system. Haze composition is very

complicated, including hundreds of atmospheric chemistry particulate matter.

Which is bad for your health mainly aerosol particles less than 10 microns in

diameter, such as mineral particles, sea salt, sulfate, nitrate, organic aerosol

particles, fuel and car exhaust, etc, it can directly enter and adhesion in the

human respiratory tract and alveoli. Especially the submicron particles are

deposited on upper and lower respiratory tract and alveolar, causes the disease

such as the acute rhinitis and acute bronchitis. For obstructive bronchus

asthma, chronic bronchitis, emphysema and chronic respiratory diseases such as

chronic obstructive pulmonary disease patients, haze weather can make the

illness acute or acute exacerbation. If this kind of environment will cause lung

cancer for a long time.

2. The effects on the cardiovascular system. Haze weather pollutants in the

air, air pressure is low, easy to induce acute cardiovascular disease. Such as

heavy fog, the moisture content is very high, if people in outdoor activities

and sports, the bodys sweat is not easy to discharge, cause people bosom

frowsty, increased blood pressure.

3. The fog haze weather can also result in close formation ultraviolet

weakened, activity of the infectious pathogen in the air, increase of infectious

diseases.

4. Reduce because of the fog the sun, ultraviolet irradiation in children

is insufficient, inadequate vitamin D in the body to generate, the absorption of

calcium significantly reduce, serious can cause rickets in infants, childrens

growth to slow down.

5. Affect mental health. Heavy fog weather depression, due to weak light

and easy to let a person produce mental laziness, depression, and pessimism,

encounter something goes wrong and even easier to spin out of control.

6. Affect the traffic safety. Low vision in haze weather, visibility, air

quality is poor, easy to cause traffic jams, traffic accidents.

As the Christmas Day is coming, our class decided to send some gifts to our

teachers, because we wanted to show our gratitude to them. At first, we had no

idea what to buy, because we wanted to do something special. So at last an idea

came to my mind. I advised to write a card, pasting some pictures of classmates

on it. Everybody agreed with me, so we spent a day to take some funny pictures,

and everybody wrote down their names on the card. When we sent this gift to the

teachers, they loved it so much. They were so impressed by this precious

surprise and would keep it forever.

Zhang Ying is my good friend. She’s in Class1, Grade4 in Tianjiao Primary

School. She’s a model student. She’s smart and she’s helpful, too. She often

helps teachers and young students at school. She is good at Chinese, math,

English, arts and crafts, music and so on. She has a lot of hobbies. She likes

painting and drawing. And she likes listening to music, having picnics with her

parents. Oh yeah, she likes fishing, too. But she doesn’t like playing

basketball, football, table tennis or volleyball. Zhang Ying is the best friend

of mine. I like playing with her. We always work together and help each

other.

October 1st is the national day of our country, which is a public holiday

for the whole country. It’s an important day that marks the beginning of PRC. On

that day, there are plenty of celebrations holding throughout the country, from

the central government to the general people. And public places, including big

squares, parks are decorated in festive theme. In recent years, the national

holiday means the golden week as well, which is a short holiday that all people

expect to. With the improvement of living standards, people have more money and

desire to travel and the golden week is a good chance for them. Besides, for

those people who would not go out, it’s a good time to have a good rest as well.

Therefore, the national day means a lot to the Chinese.

Speaking of reading, many people are excited because reading brings them

both knowledge and entertainment. By reading, we can learn lots of information

and know our history. But for some people, reading is not their priority. They

will choose to watch movies to have fun. However, I think people can benefit a

lot by reading.

First of all, reading can let us know what have happened in history. Since

history is recorded in books, if we read books, then we can not only what have

happened in history but also we can better understand the great figures of the

age.

Secondly, reading can enrich our knowledge. By reading, we can know

different kinds of things, how things happen and how to avoid bad things from

happening. Books record a wide range of things about life. Through reading, we

can know various aspects of life.

Thirdly, reading teaches us skills. There are so many books about how to

learn a certain language, how to get a good job, how to become popular in your

circle, how to cook and so on. Thus, these kinds of books can make us more

skillful if we do a certain thing.

All in all, we can find lots of benefits through reading.

Every child is surrounded by the deep mother love. However, we often turn a

blind eye to the love. One day I deeply felt the love.

One day I hurried home for lunch after school, because there would be an exam

in the afternoon and I had expected to go back to school early to prepare for

the exam. But when I got home, the lunch was not ready yet. I felt unhappy. When

the dishes were served, I forund none I like. I ran out of my house angrily and

wanderde on the street for a while,hungry. Then I walked to school.

When I got into the classroom, I saw a lunch box on my desk. One classmate

told me that it was my mother ther that had brought it here.After opening the

box, I found my favorite food inside. My eyes was moist with tears.

Mother gave me her love without asking for return, How deep mother love

is!

Mothers Day is a celebration honoring mothers and celebrating motherhood,

maternal bonds and the influence of mothers in society. Its a day to show

thanks to mothers. This festival first appeared in ancient Greece and modern

Mothers Day originated in the United States which usually falls on the second

Sunday of May each year. Mothers usually receive gifts on this day and

carnation(康乃馨) is regarded as the flower for mother. In China, the flower for

mother is day lily(萱草花), also known as Nepenthe(忘忧草). In addition, cleaning up

the room, doing housework and a big dinner are considered to be the best

Mothers Day gifts.

假设你是红星中学高三(1)班的学生李华，请根据以下四幅图的先后顺序，用校刊“英语园地”写一篇短文，记述你和同学们向学校提推荐，解决自行车存放问题的过程。

注意： 1。 词数不少于 60。

2。 短文的开头已给出，不计入总词数。

范文：

There was a problem with the parking place for bikes in our school， I noticed the entrance was small and almost blocked。 So my classmates and I had a discussion and wrote a report。 Then we went to meet the schoolmaster in his office and gave the report to him。 He accepted our suggfestions。 Soon afterwards， a second entrance was opened to the parking place。 Now it is easy to park our bikes there。

What do you usually do in your spare time to relax yourself? Let me tell

you some ways to.First of all, you can stay in bed for a while, sleeping makes

people feel good.Secondly, you can join your friends in some fun parties, talks

with friends will let you feel comfortable.Thirdly, you can go outing alone. You

can either breathe new fresh air in the mountains or you can take a look at how

beautiful the nature looks like.Fourth, why dont you just play sports with your

family? Youll feel tired if you do too much exercise once, but it keeps you

healthy and energetic.Whats your opinion?

Dragon Boat race Traditions

At the center of this festival are the dragon boat races. Competing teams drive their colorful dragon boats forward to the rhythm of beating drums. These exciting races were inspired by the villagers valiant attempts to rescue Chu Yuan from the Mi Luo river. This tradition has remained unbroken for centuries.

Tzung Tzu

A very popular dish during the Dragon Boat festival is tzung tzu. This tasty dish consists of rice dumplings with meat, peanut, egg yolk, or other fillings wrapped in bamboo leaves. The tradition of tzung tzu is meant to remind us of the village fishermen scattering rice across the water of the Mi Luo river in order to appease the river dragons so that they would not devour Chu Yuan.

Ay Taso

The time of year of the Dragon Boat Festival, the fifth lunar moon, has more significance than just the story of Qu Yuan. Many Chinese consider this time of year an especially dangerous time when extra efforts must be made to protect their family from illness. Families will hang various herbs, called Ay Tsao, on their door for protection. The drinking of realgar wine is thought to remove poisons from the body. Hsiang Bao are also worn. These sachets contain various fragrant medicinal herbs thought to protect the wearer from illness.

翻译：风俗习惯端午节最重要的活动是龙舟竞赛。比赛的队伍他们多彩的龙舟前进的鼓声中。这项活动的灵感是来自村民的勇敢的尝试营救汨罗江畔的屈原。这个传统一直保持了几个世纪。

粽子非常受欢迎的菜在端午节粽子。粽子的米包着肉、花生、蛋黄及其他材料，再以竹叶包裹。而粽子的传统是为了提醒我们的渔夫，将米丢进汨罗河水安抚蛟龙，希望他们不要将屈原吃掉。

塔索(Taso)的时间每年的端午节，农历的第五天，具有更多的意义，不仅仅是屈原的故事。许多中国人认为每年的这个时候，一个特别危险的时候，必须做出额外的努力，保护家人免受疾病。家庭在门上将挂各种草药，叫驱邪。喝雄黄酒被认为是去除体内的毒物。香包也穿，它是以含有多种香味药草认为保护人们远离疾病。

Because the Palace Museum is a place of five thousand years of brilliance

and ancient culture, so he has long been a tourist attraction in my heart, and

this summer vacation I have finally made a dream come true.

In Beijing I will ride my father and mother went to the tiananmen square,

across tiananmen square, the meridian gate of the world-famous greeted the hall

of supreme harmony, the hall of supreme harmony majestic, magnificent, colorful

glazed tile, such as a long arranged very neat. Curved corner with a monster,

four up the eaves of the cock appear grand hall of supreme harmony, to the hall

of supreme harmony, seventy-two large andalusite carved dragon painted chicken

shows the architecture of the feudal monarchy. The golden roof reflects the

majesty and status of the ancient Chinese emperors. The great hall looked solemn

and solemn, but the beauty of the appearance was so monotonous and heavy that I

was in vain. I dont know why I feel as if a group of puppets are standing

respectfully on either side of the house. Incense sticks up in the incense

burner, and the emperor sits high in the temple. The Palace Museum, a symbol of

the ancient kingship, has been invaded by a brick and a brick. It is far from

the palace of Buckingham Palace.

In the afternoon, we in addition to the front door, look back at taihe

light standing in tiananmen square, this magnificent buildings, so the layout of

the orderly, so solemn, not amazing, hope this trip to the Forbidden City will

become my eternal memory.

Many people dream to live a healthy life. But sometimes they do not have a

full understanding of healthy life. In my mind, a healthy life includes physical

and mental health. People need to have a healthy diet and regular exercise to

make our physical more and more healthy. At the same time, people have to

remember that mental health is also very important. People need to find ways to

relax themselves and keep a good mood every day. At least do not be depressed

for a long time. People can have a healthy life only when they keep a good

health between physical and mental.

It is widely noted that lots of traditional culture is disappearing along

with the development of technology. Many ancient architectures and traditional

ways of living have been deserted. It seems that the traditional culture and

craftsmanship will be replaced in this modern era.

The following reasons can account for the above phenomenon. Firstly,

traditional technologies are always considered ineffective while the new

sciences are always highly efficient, because modern science and technology

facilitate both our daily and academic life a lot, with which we can save much

money and time. Secondly, it is costly to protect the traditional culture,

especially the maintenance and repair of the historical buildings.

In my opinion, although traditional culture is an ancient heritage, it

couldnt keep pace with the development of society. It is the tide of history

that the traditional culture and technology will no doubt be eliminated in the

end.

Almost all of us heard the story “Here Comes the Wolf” when we were little

kids. What we can learn from the story is that we must be honest. However,

there’re lots of phenomena of dishonesty nowadays。

Being dishonest does great harm not only to other people but also to

yourself. Take the case of fake milk powder for example. After drinking this

kind of milk, the babies had big heads while their legs and arms were still

thin, which badly affected their health. To our great relief, the producers got

accused and punished for all the serious consequences in the end。

Having the reputation of being honest and reliable will make other people

trust you, which will provide you many benefits and give you opportunities that

others may not get. Being honest, you will find it easier to cooperate with

others and people will be friendly to you and support you. In a sense, if life

is a long journey, honesty will be the backpack that should be taken along all

the way. Let’s pick up our “backpack”—honesty, and start the wonderful

journey!

It seems like a silly question, anyone in sane would give a hand to the elderly who fell. But in China, this question is becoming tricky. Many news report that there are some old people not just fell, they do it on purpose. Usually, they walk on a crowdy street, and pretend to faint or just lay down on the ground, intend to accuse the one who comes to help as a perpetrator and blackmail him/her for the treatment fee. Many people have fell for that and had to pay as there is no witness to prove their innocence. As for these negative news, people is afraid to help those old people in need, that makes some of them who are in real trouble could not get help in time. I once asked one of my friends: “Why the old people turn bad? If you see one in the street, would you help?” He said: “It is not the old people turn bad, it is the bad people turn old. I will video him/her to make a statement first, then decide if I would help.”

这似乎是个愚蠢的问题,任何清醒的人遇到跌倒的老人都会伸出援助之手。但在中国，这个问题变得棘手。很多新闻报道说有些老人不只是跌倒而已，他们是故意这么做的。通常他们会走到人潮涌动的街头，假装晕倒或者是直接躺在地上，想要指控那些来帮助他的人为肇事者，敲诈他们要治疗费。很多人都上当了，由于没有目击者证明他们的清白，他们被迫支付了费用。正因为这些负面新闻，人们害怕去帮助那些需要帮助的老人，也因此造成了那些真正有困难的老人没有得到及时的帮助。我曾经问我一个朋友：“为什么现在的老人变坏了?如果你在街上看到这样的老人你会帮助吗?”他说：“不是老人变坏了，是坏人变老了。我会先录像让他做一个声明，再决定是否帮助他。”

It is well known that exercise is important. In our school, we have to do an hours exercise every day. Many students are very happy. In the one hour, some of us play basketball, football and ping pong, and some run around the playground. Everyone is talking and laughing. I love this activity very much. I also hope that there will be more and more sunlight sports in our life after school. That not only makes us happy, but also makes our body healthier.

dear dick,

i am very glad to hear from you. you asked me about the change of school education in china. we are really happy about the changes called on to reduce learning load. before i had to study six days a week and i always went to bed after 11:30. i seldom had free time to do what i like. but now i have more spare time. i can read many interesting books, watch tv or even do some sports. and i never feel tired in the class as before, because i go bed at 10:00. all of my classmates are happy about this new arrangement of things.

1. Why are people tired on April Fools Day? (愚人节人们为什么疲倦?)

答：Because they have just had a long March. ( 因为他们刚过了长长的三月。March 三月;行军)

2.What weather do mice and rats fear? (老鼠害怕什么天气?)

答：When its raining cats and dogs.(下大雨。rain cats and dogs 下大雨 )

3.When do dogs refuse to follow their masters? (狗什么时候不愿跟随主人?)

答：When their masters go to the flea market.(主人去跳蚤市场时。Flea 跳蚤 flea market 旧货市场 )

4.What question can never be answered by “yes”? (哪个问题永远不能回答“是的”?)

答：Are you asleep? (你睡着了吗)

5.What tree is always very sad? (哪种树总是很伤心?)

答：Weeping willow. ( 垂柳 weep哭泣 willow柳树)

6.When can you get water with a net? (什么时候可以用网兜装水?)

答：When water is turned into ice. (当水结成冰时)

7.Why is the pig always eating?猪为什么没完没了地吃?

答：Hes making a hog of himself.它想成为一只肉猪。

8.Whats the longest word in the world?世界上最长的单词是什么?

答：Smiles. Because theres a mile between the letter s.微笑。因为两个字母S中间隔了一里。

9.What question is that to which you must always answer "yes"? 什么问题你只能回答“yes”?

答："What does y-e-s spell?" (当别人问你)“yes”怎么拼?

10.Where were you when the power was cut off? 当停电的时候你在哪?

答：In the darkness. 在黑暗中

愚人节整人笑话

1、你都20多了，有些事情也该让你知道了!天，是用来刮风下雨地;地，是用来长花长草地;我，是用来证明人类是多么伟大地;而你呢，就是用来炖粉条地。

2、公主在城堡沉睡200年后，终于来了位王子。王子俯下身去吻了公主一下，于是魔咒解除。公主醒了过来，害羞地看着王子。王子松了口气说：“祖姑婆您总算醒了!”

3、下班就回家的是穷鬼，9点回家的是酒鬼，11点回家的是色鬼，2-3点回家的是赌鬼，不回家的是野鬼!

4、搞对象不是看对方会为你做什么，而是看对方会为你而改变什么比如我正在追的女孩，已经为我改了三个手机号了……

5、有一天，一个人在沙漠里挖坑。有个过路的人见了，问他挖什么，他说：“我在沙漠里埋了一些钱，现在找不到埋的地方了。” 那人说：“你埋钱的时候应当做个标记呀!”“我做了标记。”“什么标记?”他说：“当时天上的乌云正遮着它。”

6、你长得很抽象!你长得很朦胧!你长得很模糊!你长得很……诡异啊!饶了我吧，我实在描绘不出你的样子，我真没见过鬼。

7、尊敬的用户：您好!因你的手机外型难看，式样过时，已严重影响市容市貌，且阻碍了移动通讯业务的发展，本台决定于10分钟后发射信号摧毁该手机!

8、我说：每想你一次星星就落下一滴泪，大海就是这样形成的。你说：每想我一次你就放一个屁，臭氧层就是这样形成的。愚人节快乐!

9、绅士初次到伦敦，对警察说：“我和妻子各自走失了，要是她经过这里，你可叫她等在这里吗!”警察：“可是我不认识她呀!”绅士：“呀!一点不错!我真没有想到这事，那你叫她不要等了。”

10、祝你做个快乐店小二：没事看看二人转，幸福梅花二度开，聆听美好二重奏，发了工资拿双份，不用做事两头闲，出门潇洒走两步，人人都说，你很二!

11、青年见禅师：女友总是跟我闹分手，希望大师指点。”禅师笑而不语，抓来一只鸡，在鸡腿上缠根线，他一拉线，鸡立即跌倒，鸡挣扎起来继续走，禅师又一拉，鸡又跌倒，如此反复八次之多。

12、一天，我和男友大吵一架，闹得很凶 ，谁也不让谁，我一气之下，用手挠了他胳膊上好几个血道子;他也急眼了，抓起我的手狠狠的按在桌子上;我害怕了，只见他抄起一把指甲刀给我把指甲剪了。。。

13、大学夜里忽然醒来，看到一人影，站在老三的床前晃来晃去。开灯!是隔壁寝室的老六，老六梦游，摸者我们老三的脑袋。嘴里在念叨：“瓜熟了，瓜熟了”。后来我们在也不忘记睡觉锁门了!

14、拔苗助长是荒诞，掩耳盗铃是蛮干;草船借箭是妙算，破釜沉舟是决战;风花雪月是浪漫，舍生取义是奉献;你若继续往下看，你就是一个笨蛋!愚人节快乐!

15、非诚勿扰上，女嘉宾说我负责貌美如花，你负责赚钱养家。男嘉宾说：我能一直赚钱养家，你能一直貌美如花吗?yulu.jb51.net

16、荷包蛋爱上了煎蛋。这天晚上，煎蛋听见荷包蛋在窗外唱：“这是一首煎蛋的小情歌……”

17、沙僧说我有16变!八戒说我有32变!悟空说我有72变!唐僧大怒：西天路上没见变个电话，人家妖怪都拿手机看短信呢!愚人节快乐!

18、紧急提醒：近日恐有龙卷风天色，出门时务必随身携带两个10公斤重的哑铃，以免被暴风卷上西天。体重轻于50公斤者须加倍。

19、这是一首李白的诗，请大声朗读：卧室春绿，握梅又闻花，我只会中第，邀文卧室睡，卧室知春绿。

20、我不迷信，但我坚信愚人节这天诸事不宜。风声雨声读书声，声声属实耳?家事国事天下事，事事须查证!愚人节快到了，祝你愚人成功，且不被人愚。

21、住的很蜗居，活的很窝囊，生的很窝火，长得似窝瓜，吃的是窝头，愚人节到了，祝你和你的同事“一窝子”都开心快乐。

22、窗前泛起点点亮光，疑是盗贼前来逛逛，忙揉睡眼仔细观望，原是你在月下繁忙，面对此景心中感伤，眼中不免泪水汪汪，发条短信送去心芳，可怜的屎壳螂!

23、一座桥用两根木头搭成，一根高，一根低。有个拐子过桥，高的那根木头正好凑合着他的短腿，因此走起来平稳，就称赞说：“天底 下就数这座桥造得最好。”拐子办完事回来，由于换了方向，一高一低的桥使他特别费力，他生气他说：“这是座天底下造得最糟糕的桥了。”

24、这是我手机能发的最后一条短信了，最后这条最珍贵的我留给了你，因为有句话我一直想对你说，却没有说出口--帮我充值吧!

25、A：“我觉得我们几个也该发散一下思维，创造个吉尼斯记录什么的。”B：“好提议”A：“我砍一棵树，两头削尖，申请世界上最大的牙签记录。”B：“你讲点实用的行不行。”A：“我在地上挖个坑，灌点水，申请世界上最小的湖。”B：“那我干脆在地上刨三个洞，三个手指伸出去，申请世界上最大的保龄球。”

26、中国移动通信用户：近期由于调试网络，如遇您的手机没有信号或无法接通，请您用力将手机往地上摔，尽量使劲摔，反复几次手机即恢复正常。愚人节快乐!

27、难道风真的进了我的眼?难道你真的伤了我的心?我真的哭了耶!怎么会这样?!眼泪止不住地流，更有一种莫明的伤痛——你这个该死的洋葱!

28、说你白痴你还认识字，说你傻瓜你还知道生气，说你笨蛋你还知道回短信，说你木头你还知道看手机!祝你愚人节快乐!语录大全网

29、曾经有一分真挚的爱，我没有珍惜，失去了才后悔莫及!如果能够再来一次，我会对你说：我爱你。若要选择表白时间，我希望是：愚人节!

30、悟空在花果山开发旅游，悟净也在流沙河养了王八;师傅我写写取经的历程也出书了!大家很牵挂你，托为师带个问候，还好吧八戒。

31、一天咱俩来到一口许愿井旁，我弯下腰许了一个愿还往井里扔个硬币，你也想许愿但你弯腰时不小心翻入井里，我被惊呆了，喃喃自语道：还真灵嘿!

32、“天下熙熙，皆为利来;天下攘攘，皆为名往。”哥们，你牛，“大吉大利”和“臭名昭著”名利双收。愚人节到了，祝开心“愚”乐。

33、有这么一天，豆腐在大街上闲逛，遇见了醋，豆腐就调侃的说：“好大的酸味啊，又去挑拨人家的感情了?”醋一生气就把豆腐给拌了!

34、可怜的手机用户，非常遗憾，由于您确认了此条短信，所以传染了愚人节细菌。现在细菌衣着统一精神饱满队列整齐，正迈着矫健的步伐通过你的身体……

35、。…作业做了很久，顺手打开收音机，一个温柔的声音传出：“…如果肤色分红，脸上的绒毛细嫩柔软，那么说明很健康…”听到这里，忍不住摸了自己的脸，对镜顾盼，再笑一笑，样子健康可爱。这时，又听播音员说道：“好，听众朋友，这次我们的《养猪知识讲座》就到这里……”

36、人人都赞你帅，可知人家只是说你衰!大家都封你为偶像，可知那仅是呕吐的对象!真不知是因为错手制造了你才制造愚人节，还是因为担心愚人节没人过才制造你!

37、有事的时候，会忙得晕头转向;没事的时候，会闲得无聊;我最喜欢做的事情就是想想你，给你发发短信，因为又一个傻瓜看到我的短信了。

38、做家具的是木材，懂诗词的是秀才，众人想的是钱财，被培养的是人才，女人要的是身材，发消息的是天才，正看短信的是蠢才!

39、愚人节日短信传，到处搞笑声不断。妙笔生花有高招，不知不觉骗上当。愚人心切忙前赶，忽醒细悟已上当。祝友愚节喜欢颜，生活多姿色斑斓。愚人节快乐!

40、给你讲个故事，从前有个笨蛋，他非常笨，别人问他什么问题他都只会摇头或回答“没有”，这个故事你听过吗?愚人节整人笑话

41、一种人可以和我生生世世，叫情人;有一种人可以与我血浓于水，叫亲人;还有一种人被我卖了还在帮数钱，例如看短信的你，就叫愚人!祝你节日快乐!

42、在一次辩论中，瓦特激动的说：“我观察了很长时间，发现在盆底加热会使水沸腾而沸腾的水会产生水蒸气。这个水蒸气的力量非常的大!甚至可以推动上面的……”“我没问你这个!”法官打断了瓦特，“我是问，你当时真没发现你爸在澡盆里吗?”

43、晚上，一群同学在学样外面烧烤摊喝酒。喝着喝这，一个同学要去小便，他便跑到不远处的一棵小树边上解决，办完事后却怎么也走不了，就在那儿睡着了。哥几个要走了，发现少一个人，便找了起来，结果在小树边找到了，哇，原来他用皮带把自已与小树绑一块儿啦!

44、有一种缘是百年难见，有一种念是心心相连，有一种情是至死不变，有一种爱是魂绕梦牵，有一种问候发自心田，有一个傻蛋会把信息看完!完了，还看啥!

45、风撩起你的长发，你显得更潇洒!浪花拍打你的脚丫，你显得更无暇!你迎着东方的朝霞，就像一朵海浪花!不是熟人，很难看出你是傻瓜!愚人节快乐!

46、我天天都会向佛祖祈求得到一枝持久盛开的玫瑰花，等到九百九十九朵的时候一起送给你并动情的说：“小样儿，我就不信招来的蜜蜂不蛰你!”

47、经过《深度观察》，我发现我爱上了你!我多想穿越《东方时空》，和你《面对面》，讨个《今日说法》，并《实话实说》的表白：我爱你，cctv!

48、天气预报：今天夜间本地区会下人民币，西北方向有时有支票，局部地区还会有金块!气象部门提醒市民备好大麻袋，准备发财!祝愚人节愉快!

49、我是一棵孤独的树， 千百年来矗立在路旁， 寂寞的等待， 只为有一天当你从我身边走过时， 为你倾倒， 砸不扁你就算白活了。

50、哥们儿，还记得小时候吗?你十分的聪明，别人回答不上来的问题，你总是毫不迟疑地回答上来。记得那次英语课上，老师教我拼写英语单词，我说：“猪是PUG。”别人都不作声，只有你大声地喊了起来：“错了，弄错了，猪不是U，是I，是I!”